I am awfully jealous
I am in a relationship since some years now, but I am awfully jealous.
I cannot stand it when my boyfriend is looking at other woman. Everywhere we go, I look around with jealousy to see if there are no beautiful women around.
I get jealous or angry when he looks at a beautiful woman or when he looks on television at a pretty woman or in a magazine....
It drives me crazy. I want that it stops, I don't want to be afraid that there are women around where he could look at. I make him and myself unhappy with my behavior and I want to do something about it, but I don't know how.
I think that any woman is more beautiful, sweeter, better, brighter, smarter, slimmer and better then me....
I am exactly the same as how you describe it. I also don't dare to go anywhere out of fear I cannot control my anger.
It triggers me a lot and my boyfriend gets super angry then. We get into big fights about it. There are some good books about jealousy. You could look them up on the internet.
For me it is a very complex emotion that also involves other emotions such as anger, shame, despair, humiliation etc i find it very difficult. Sometimes I want to stop my relationship so that I don't have to deal with the jealousy anymore but my boyfriend doesn't want that.
Good luck.
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