Sex problems - Tips

Make time for sexuality in your relationship. Sexuality does not always have to lead to intercourse.

You can also keep it accessible, maybe it can be like in the start of your relation: fast kissing, make love with your clothes on, caress each other.

Try and keep sex playful.
Don't force it too much.

Are you experiencing problems with your sexlife? Have a look into the ideas you have in your family about sex and sexuality. It can be that there is a history of miscarriages or an abortion nobody was allowed to talk about. These things can be of influence on how free you feel about sex and your sexuality. A therapist can support you in this.

Make a 'sexy list'. That is an extensive list that you and your partner each make. You put on it what excites you, what arouses you. Be honest. Then you can give each other the list and talk about it with each other.

Don't expect your partner to do everything that is on your list. You do get more insight in what you like and what your partner likes.

And if you both feel like, then you can every once in a while surprise your partner by doing one of the things on the list.

Enjoying a good relationship does not necessarily mean that there is a satisfying sexual relationship. Because for a sexual relationship, other ingredients are needed then for a safe relationship.

Don't hesitate to seek help for this.

Are your dealing with sex problems in your relationship? Could you use some support?

A relationship counsellor / psychosexual therapist can help you.

For many people it helps to write down and share their story with others. You can share your story on the intimacy-issues-peer-support-forum on this website.

A busy family life can be the cause of less time for intimacy. Make time for it. Book a hotel. Organize a sleepover for the kids and spend time with just the two of you for a day and a night.

Intimacy can have many forms. A pleasant night together could start with a good conversation or a walk in the park, make dinner together or finish a job in the house together. And appreciated each other for it.

Try to share your 'personal manual' (your likes and dislikes) as much as possible with your partner. This can of course change from moment to moment. Try to be as open as possible with your partner, communicating your wants and needs.